I have custody of Bernice.  I share custody of Bernice with a friend who is also bipolar.  Whoever is the most depressed gets Bernice.  Bernice is a fluffy pink dragon who sings opera.

I've become obsessed with death.  My life is such a waste of resources and I feel everyone would be better off without me around.  I know they don't see it that way, so I guess I have to hang around being a waste.  There are so many people with fatal diseases who want to live and who have something to offer this world.  Why couldn't I take their place?

Since death is not an option, I'm working on this website.  I need things to do that keep my mind off self-destructive thoughts.  Once the site is finished... I don't know.  I guess I'll have to think of something else.

Jeeeez, lighten up. "Whoever is the most depressed gets Bernice" Presumeably that's because Bernice sort of cheers you up? Well, for all I know, Bernice is a hamster but still, hardly call someone who cares for a hamster a waste of resources.

I prescribe more jazz in the diet, and regular execises !

Faangler, how DARE you tell her to "lighten up."! I don't care who you are or whether you're "joking" - minimizing someone's feelings this way is not okay!

Dragonrider, every human being on the planet has an important purpose, or mission, to fulfill in this life. Perhaps your mission is to help others who suffer as you have and as you do. Many people who have been through what you've been through feel like they're all alone in the world; maybe part of your reason for being in this life at this time is to find a way to use your own life experiences to reach out to others. Your life is NOT a waste, dragonrider - don't ever let anyone make you think that!

I think it's wonderful that you have something (Bernice) you love and feel safe with. When depression strikes, it's always good to have something to cuddle up with that doesn't judge you, or minimize your feelings, or talk back to you, or anything mean like that. I suffer from depression, too, and I have my own "Bernice" - and it helps. A lot.